24 May Finding Purpose in Motherhood
Being a stay at home mom: the days sort of blend together in a mesh of diaper changes, endless snack times, naps, carpool lanes, and picking up the same toys day after day. Husband comes home from work and you realize you haven’t had an adult conversation all day.
“The days are long but the years go by quick”.
We’ve all heard some version of that phrase about motherhood. But we roll our eyes and inwardly argue– “you’re not living this- the lack of sleep, the child who refuses to potty train, the struggle to fit in with other moms…
In the midst of the trenches of motherhood, it’s easy to lose sight of your purpose.
So what is your purpose? It’s important to sit down and really think through this. It might help to even Make a “motherhood mission statement”, and then follow with some practical, achievable goals. What do you want for you children? How do you want to raise them?
Do you want to teach them to love movement and fitness, and embrace healthy nutrition? Take them to the gym with you, join a mommy and me fitness class, make meal time fun and healthy by having incorporating a “picnic lunch” (even if it’s inside)!
If you’re a Christian, do you want to raise them in the faith and teach them God’s Word? Read a Children’s Bible to them before bed, play kid friendly music that teaches Scripture. (read more on tools to teach Scripture to your kids)
Do you want to raise them to be kind and care for others and act compassionately? Volunteer together at a local soup kitchen as a family. Model random acts of kindness as you run errands. Bake cookies for a neighbor going through a hard season.
Do you want them to love nature and be active in caring for our Earth? Make a goal to get outside everyday- no matter the weather. Discover together! Go to a park and pick up trash together.
These goals will give you clarity and purpose in the everyday ordinary of being a stay at home mom.
And I just want to pause tell you, that you are seen, mama. I know you’re doing the best you can. I know you’re a little weary. And I know this can get overwhelming, even with the best of intentions and carefully planned out goals.
Here are just a couple of ways to find joy and success in this motherhood journey:
- Remember to celebrate the small victories
- Do something for yourself: whether it’s going to the gym, making date night a priority, or joining a mom’s group. When you take care of yourself, you will be equipped and prepared to fully invest in your family.
- put down the phone, stop comparing yourself to that other mom on social media, and get down on the floor and just spend some time with your kid(s). You won’t regret it.
And when you feel overwhelmed and at the end of your rope, CHOOSE THANKS-
Gratitude is a choice, and powerful way to shift your perspective from despair to joy. Write out a list of each little moment throughout the day that you are thankful for. Something like:
-I only microwaved my coffee twice morning 😉
-siblings quietly played together without arguing while I fixed lunch
-the smell of clean laundry
-little sister threw a tantrum, but was receptive to time out and apologized without me having to coach her
-I meal prepped for the week!
And then suddenly, you realize that though the days can be slow and hard, the years really do go by too quick. You can barely grasp the changing days as you simultaneously rejoice and despair over your child’s growth, discovery of the world, and increasing independence.
Motherhood is about the slow surrender.
from the moment that umbilical cord is cut, your job as a mother is to daily let go in small ways. Your job is surrendering them as they grow up and learn in independence, and trusting that they will remember and learn from all that you taught them.
Emily Weener is a member at Girlfriends Fit Club. She is also the author of the blog Darling Little Life; a lifestyle blog including faith, fashion, family and everything in between.